today is the offical start of the so far first vacation we have for this school year. whew! it was almost perfect but then for the nth time it was ruined by errr only i would know.... i just figured out, no matter how much you give for one person it doesnt always mean getting back the same...or worse even getting the opposite of what ur giving. ahhh life sucks (at that certain area of my life) nothing is perfect...i got hurt, if frustrates me, it gets me furious and at the same time makes me realize what i should have realized early on. owell, i wallowed over this, at least to get desensitized, i dont wanna dwell on the thought further and make things harder for me. i just wish i could stand still with this decision of just disappearing...ITS NOT WORTH IT, REALLY... i figured, no matter how long, how much, all positive driving factors a person could give, if its one way, there's not even a speck of possibility that it would flourish, or climb up at that level you've been yearning to reach. argh...i am pissed, and more than that, i feel disrespectful towards him...MORON, MORON, MORON....im not good enough for him no matter what i do, on the other hand, i realized, if im not good, then he's even less of what's worse. I know God will take care of this very well...i just dont wanna entertain the bad thoughts and pain it gives me, not anymore, i had enough...
habang nagchichikahan kame ni jaja last night dahil sa mga pangyayaring di ko inaasahan (kinukuwento ko ung mga buraot) naputol ang usap dahil manonood daw siya ng the pursuit of happiness. ayun nakinuod na rin ako. kuwento ni Chris Gardner....hay, nakakalungkot pero talagang na-inspire ako sa movie na to....NAKAKABILIB. ang igsi lng nung movie pero talagang heart warming. pero isa siguro sa na-reflect ko eh ung FOCUS. sobrang focused niya kasi sa goal niya, kung ano ang gusto niya un lang talaga. wala lang, naisip ko lang dapat ganon din ako hehehe. nakakaiyak ung scene na sa banyo sila natulog mag-ama.....hay, nakakalungkot isipin na may mga taong nakakaexperience ng ganon....pero lahat ng hirap nila, talagang nag pay off din naman =) sipag talaga at diskarte...wahehehe apektado daw talaga ako sa movie, di ko kasi napanood yan dati eh hehe =) TRUE STORY siya galing!
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