sweet nothings

i got tired. this day was half joy and half upsetting. its fun i had enough time with him today. i enjoyed. i really wanna get through my driving lesson. well i wanna be perfect at it. it was kinda annoying. people really vary. and sometimes you get to encounter some who's hard to decipher. im sleepy. i had a long day.

gee im back! well it was only 2 days that i was out of town...it was stressful good thing im back. surprise surprise! he attempted to call me! was it an attempt?? or jaz checkin out if im still alive! that dork thinks im half-wit not to discover who the caller is duh??? im starting not to care anymore! though im thinking a bit what was it all about??? but whenever i start summing up everything that happened i know i've got enough reason just to stop and ignore everything. it was a tiresome weekend. even so i had a great time spending it fully with my family. i thought the trip would give me time to ponder things and entertain bubbly thoughts but unluckily i was too drowsy during the entire trip...

Dear lie You suck You said you could fix anything Instead I’m fucked You made things even worse for me If I had balls I’d tell you get away from me Guess I’m not smart I let you unnerve me I let you control me Afraid the truth would hurt me When it’s you that hurts me more Chorus Get outta my mouth Get outta my head Get outta my mind Stop puttin’ words in my head Get outta my mouth You’re nothing but trouble Get outta my life Get out of me Out of me out of me Out of me Out of me lie Lie lie lie lie Dear lie You’re dumb You think you’ve got the best of me You think you won Misread my vulnerability I’ve got your walls Now get the hell away from me I’ve learned your art Won’t let you unnerve me Won’t let you control me The truth will only free me And your lies won’t hurt no No more Chorus Lie lie I’ve got Your walls Now get the hell away from me I learned your art Won’t let you unnerve me Wont’ let you control me The truth will only free me And your lies won’t hurt no No more Chorus Lie l...

yesterday afternoon..i bought myself some stuff...just love to go out without any worries...i did enjoy..i jaz hope when my classes start i cud still afford to go out and enjoy myself but maybe less of what i am able to do now. today was a great day for bebe and i. we had a nice time being together..playing fools etc...things are getting back to normal. we had a sumptuous lunch. simple but it really meant a lot. my heart pounded with joy spending some hours with him, enjoying ourselves... im really hoping things will do better. But time is a real threat to all these things that's why im making d most out of it.

today i stumbled into several stuff that reminds me of you. i trembled seeing our smiles on a photo taken more than a year ago. reading your letters gave me a familiar feeling almost exactly the way i felt the first time i read it. but at the back of my mind, i was telling myself these were all lies. all were fantasies being dreamt by a teenage girl who was never hurt and never felt being left behind. i know for a fact i was crazy then. im not even sure if there were regrets. but whenever i refresh those sweet moments i had with you my heart felt coldness...longing for you and wondering will there still be a chance to have you close to me once more. madness, it is...that i am completely aware of. but through the years i have tried to push you away from my mind heart and my mind...the more i build barriers, the more i get trapped. all these time i was trying to convice myself that you were the best liar alive that i have encountered...but your lies were so good...so good i wanted to ta...

i have accomplished things since yesterday. i was able to adjust my activities well insert chores to add up to my daily routine. it's working good so far. im just worried sooner i'll be busy and i guess i will be adjusting so much with the environment and roll of things i need to do. i've got little worries so far since bebe and i are in good terms lately. We're having a good break from bickering. i just hope this will continue. im gaining much weight already...i need to slim down...oh how i wish it's that easy...im trying to eat less carbs but these were frustrated attempts. I've always loved butter and the menu these past days were glistening with so much animal fat...argh! im looking forward to busier days...how i wish i could start my driving lesson. i wanna get my license sooner before classes start.

Your Spicy Score: Medium You are hot enough to make a lasting impression, but you strike a balance. You know when you're being too fiery, and you also know when to bump up the temperature. Naughty and clever. Sexy yet down to earth. You know how to work both sides of your personality. Men find you hot yet approachable - the perfect combination! How Spicy Are You?

pretty nice for a start...i wanted to do as much as i could for this day...half of it was accomplished but i wanna do more...maximize every resource blah blah blah...i enjoyed this day spending it with bebe...oh now i miss him