vacation

after how many months of struggling with my first year in med school, finally im having a real break. everything is so fast, and it hardly sinks in that one year is all over. a package of surprises. full of twists and unexpected situations. now, reviewing the previous posts i've made (which by the way dated almost a year now) it was indeed out of my expectations.

the new people i've met, the old ones i was forced to let go...new issues to deal with. honestly, i really do not have any pinch of idea where all of these will lead me. that was a long span of solid difficulty. and now, i am optimistic that the rainy days of my life will soon be over.

adjustments, i made a lot of it. i learned, and i was able to surpass everything. i guess that should take much credit ayt?

admittedly though, there are moments that i still look back, that i rant and curse the people who hurt me. i just a human, seeing them happy wouldn't make me genuinely happy as well. (partly could be) i envy yeah, thinking of the hardships i went through and then what, get left behind at peek into their happy lives now? i don't know if its correct to regard it as them benifitting after all the heartaches they caused me? i don't know, or maybe its not my time yet....

i am cautious...very much cautious now. protecting myself, because no one will do that for me. its me, myself and i. to hell with them.