bakit kaya ganon, habang nagtatagal parang nakakasawa na. nakakawalang gana. ang hirap ng malayo lang reinforcement, basta wala talagang kwenta. ang masaklap lumilipas ang lahat ng parang ganon lang na parang balewala lang lahat ng effort at pagpapasensiya. pakiramdam ko walang saysay lahat. gusto kong magalit mabuwisit, pero sawang sawa na ko, dahil sa huli ganon pa rin naman ang kalalabasan ng lahat. mawawala rin siya, gaya nilang lahat.
This entire application process is really tedious. I thought that being called for preres is good enough. Well of course it's just the beginning. Im just exagerrating when i say tired. Actually this observation period is way benign than u could imagine. Post-boards syndrome. Someone i know quitted after one duty (observership). Maybe i feel the same thing. I want a longer break. I want my free time, no responsibilities, no schedule to follow. Maybe i just enjoyed the relief of finishing the entire trail to becoming a doctor that i wanna enjoy it longer. Haist im still praying. Im so lucky actually that some would want to be in my position. But then sometimes following your heart could lead to better results. im still confused.
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